👨‍❤️‍👨 OUI

If I would have got a box of microscopes, would I be gay?

by continuing you accept the Terms you will never open

Oops, I accidentally deleted your nonsense database lol
Anyway, want some ice scream?

If I am good to you… won’t you be good to me?

People are dancing in the Home Depot.

I should be in that video!

Electronic Post Inbox

Primary

Google

Your verification code is 989545
Don’t share this code with anyone. Not even yourself.

DevZubb

Last Chekpoint: GET TO WORK
YOU NEED TO LOCK IN ON LAST CHECKPOINT OR I FIRE YOU

Storm

OI IS THE PIN LEVEL MEANT OR DO THAT
typed the code in eight times innit and it keeps saying wrong. also hiya

arch_mage

(no subject)
You received an Electronic Post from arch_mage. That is the entire event.

Facilities

Re: Re: The kitchen fridge
The fridge has been removed. The container has not.

Facilities

Re: The kitchen fridge
The container has been labelled. The label says DO NOT.

Facilities

The kitchen fridge
There is a container in the fridge. It is not labelled. It is from May.

AisarRedux

Offer to acquire The Nonsense Company
Name your price. I am currently on the yacht. REDUX FOREVER

Parm (Roblox)

Re: Spotlight Page next steps
Following up on the feature offer - are you free this week to

CalebRedux

re: the thing you asked me to program
it works on my machine. hee haw

Mista

did storm say smth about me
cos I heard she did. we’re not talkin rn btw. tell her nothin

The Nonsense Company

Reminder: all roads lead back to The Nonsense
This is an automated reminder. It is the only thing this address does.

Legal

Please stop replying to the automated reminder
It does not read your replies. We do, and we have to file them.

jrdno

I played every game
I played them all. Even the ones that aren’t out yet. I don’t know how.

IT Department

Your password has expired
It expired at 3:41 AM. We changed it for you. We will not say what to.

a player

quick question about the trilogy
Did he really create four games and call thus a trilogy?

QA

Bug: inbox has too many Electronic Posts
This Electronic Post is one of them. We are aware of the irony.

Storm

OI CAN YOU SEND ME YOUR CODE
just the numbers bit not the Electronic Post but. I’ll give it back i swear

DevZubb

Re: Last Chekpoint: GET TO WORK
I have attached a second document

Legal

Re: Re: Re: Re: Please stop replying all
This is the fourth request to stop replying all. It was sent via reply all.

NPC Workers Local 7

Notice of the strike action - immediate
NPCs in Levels 1 through 6 will not be rendering dialogue until conditions improve.

Promotions

Google Rewards

Your security code is 279247
Enter it to claim your reward. There is no reward.

Nonsense Store

48 HOURS: everything is the price it already was
The sale is that we are telling you about the prices.

Rogue Lineage

Your character died permanently. Come back.
Skill points retained: none. Nostalgia retained: some.

Padlock Depot

Because you looked at one safe
You looked at a safe once. This the rest of your life now.

Yacht Quarterly

AisarRedux, your subscription is expiring
This Electronic Post was sent to you. The name at the top was not.

Crumpet Club UK

You have 4,000 points and nothing to redeem…
The catalogue is empty. The points continue to accrue.

LinkedIn Premium

12 people viewed your profile this week
None of them are hiring. Two of them are you.

The Redux Dictatorship

Limited-time allegiance - 20% off
Offer ends when the offer ends. Allegiance is non-refundable.

Perfectly Normal Bank

You have been pre-declined
No application was required. We got ahead of it.

Domain Renewal Notice

yourgame.zip expires in 3 days
You do not own yourgame.zip. Renew it anyway.

Nonsense Store

You left something in your cart
The cart is empty. It has been empty the entire time.

Redux Digital Holding

Own a piece of the regime (limited supply)
Each token is unique. The allegiance is not.

Mailing List Central

You have been unsubscribed
You have also been subscribed to the list about being unsubscribed.

National Alert Rewards

ALERT: savings detected in your area
A mild inconvenience is expected between now and indefinitely.

That Game You Played Once

We noticed you left it
You played for 45 seconds. That’s enough to form a bond, legally.

Social

The Core Alliance

Vote closed: can you beat all three of us in a fight
Results are in. You are not going to like the margin.

AisarRedux

EXECUTIVE ORDER: this inbox
By executive order, all Electronic Posts in this inbox now belong to Reducx Holdings.

Mista

me and storm are DONE
she knows what she did. I’m not sayin what it was. she knows.

Storm

HIYA WHAT’S A CAPTCHA
it keeps askin me to click the bused innit but I only see cars

Storm

MY CAR IS GONE AGAIN
it was BLUE. that’s all I can tell ya. the crumpets are fine tho

AisarRedux

Re: Re: Re: The crown snapped again
It cost four thousand dollars and it broke day two.

Mista

ok me and storm made up
we’re best mates again. don’t bring up the car thing tho

Figma

New comment on Login Flow v4
“why does google ask twice” - reply or resolve

Discord

You have 61 unread mentions in #general
None of them are for you. One of them is about you.

arch_mage

wanna duel
no stakes. no rules. no date. no location. just the question.

Instagram

Storm tagged you in a photo
The photo is of a bus. There os no caption. There is no context.

Mista

VOTE MISTA - group chat election
I’m running for president of the group chat. storm is running against me.

Storm

HIYA I VOTED
it said president on the paper. is that the same one as the group chat one

DevZubb

I quit
Effective immediately. See you tomorrow at 9.

CalebRedux

Vote Caleb for Vice Redux
Qualifications: none. Platform: hee haw.

Updates

Roblox Creator Team

Sugar, Sugar! selected for Spotlight
Congratulations - your experience has been chosen to appear on

Roblox

You daily analytics are ready
Sessions are up. We will not say from what.

GitHub

[nonsenseco/stories] All checks have passed
SceneDirector CI passed on your latest push to main.

Stripe

Your payout is on the way
$4.12 will arrive in 2-3 business days.

Airtable

Stock Predictions Tracker - weekly summary
3 predictions resolved, 2 pending review.

New College Registrar

Reinstatement - action required
Please complete the attached form and return it before the

Nonsense Delivery

Your order was delivered to a door
A photo is attached. We cannot confirm whose door it is.

The Nonsense Game

Play test analytics digest
Act 1 retention up 6% WoW. Level 7 is still the biggest drop-off.

United Nations

Your nation’s membership is under review
We could not locate your country on any map.

Bureau of National Data

Your census has been completed on your behalf
Household size: debatable. Occupation: see file.

Electoral Commision

Voter registration: denied
Your district does not exist. It existed yesterday. We are looking into it.

National Alert System

This is a test
If this had been a real emergency, this message would be identical.

Department of Transparency

Declassified document attached
The document was one word. We still redacted it.

Bureau of Internet Conduct

Monitoring disclosure - required by law
You are being monitored. We are required to tell you that, but by whom.

Superior Court

Jury duty summons - appear immediately
You have been summoned to a jurisdiction you have never visited.

Terms & Conditions

We updated our Terms of Service
We will not tell you what changed. Reading the old version is no longer permitted.

Compliance Office

Compliance training: 847 days overdue
The training is a single 12-second video. We do not understand the delay.

Cloud Services

Your data export is ready
It is 14 terabytes. Most of it is a single cookie from 2019.

International Office

Sanctions notice - three nations
Two of them do not recognize each other. The third is Redux.

My nonsense is only like 6000 characters above the

By the way, can I connect with you?

“probably the most handsome bisexual”

Do you know real nonsense?

Being yourself is what you’re supposed to do.

You can’t change who you are, so you have to adapt, right?

We have autonomy. We get to choose to be who we want to be. That’s America.

Gender is a fluid process. I have no right to tell you what your gender is and you have no right to tell me what my gender is.

At least you got her pronouns [correctly]!

Take my contacts, you might need me sometime.

dies from cringe

Are you free for everything?

Anyway, I devoured that plate (like a lady, of course)

that was really irrelevant, but sure

You sense? Sense?

Sense. Please. Entry.

Oh, you’re like a monster in bed?

That’s not very nice to have a quiet night; you should have a busy night.

Can I take you shopping tomorrow?

In my language, “no” that means yes.

you need someone to look after you tonight

French kiss is a game?

to have a quality time

an absolute flirting god

stares into my soul

We have whatsapp.

When one door closes, another one opens.

You were capturing videos of this one. It’s very cute, yeah. The way it moves is fascinating, right? It’s interesting; the way it just crawls, ups and downs… look, it’s beauty.

🪿

It’s really like you.

BRO IS STILL LOCKED IN

😊🪿 uwu ✨

am I crazy or did he say wow

We had a luau.

Yes, indeed! I want people to see that.

a bottle of patron and an 18 pack of Bud Light, that’s what happened

you fell asleep reading the Bible drinking vodka

who hasn’t done that?

I have no explanation.

You may not be babysitting anymore after this.

Coming Soon,drunk blond in the bar

She’s uh… ay caramba!

BEST OF IN YOUR DATABASE

We’re finding nonsense everywhere

Gemoy, minggir.