Kind of ornate… eats people… y’know.

Your head can’t hurt if you don’t have a head

I just beat Clubstep! Surely nothing bad can happen in the next 10 seconds…

I doubt anything would be “wet” in the traditional sense after a quick trip to the sun and back.

moist clinical

Moist… or Maoist???

Gonna make a startup that sells 4d printed chicken. It’s the future

And those girlfriends? Albert Einstein

• NO, I WANT YOU TO SLAP MY ASS- I MEAN MY FACE.
• What?

….does yaoi count as nefarious purposes..

yeah, he won’t be able to wear clothes anymore…

Crickets in my circuitry could fix me

What if I want to enjoy motor oil

Look me in the FUCKING eye and tell me you’re not a REDACTED

This guy is making me want to become italic.

There may be an explosion. I’m suddenly very interested.

Why did that guy get a craving for the microphone.

they say this could kill a victorian child but you seem fine

What, you don’t sort your guest lists by genitalia?

WE will write

we have figured out how, with just 72 simple steps, you can hack the pissball so that you can play doom with your piss now that pissball is bricked

i hear vour concerns about lack of space but have you considered building an airship? instead of being confined to an alleyway you can have as much space as you can build on your airship. you know how to build an airship and can purchase and source materials right? seems obvious but you never know

We are building schools under the acid vats so if you don’t pay to maintain them what happens is your fault

I would never trust a Dyson Sphere to last. mean, have you seen their vacuum cleaners?

You can’t ice criminals, they’re murderous trains

“Oreo” is short for auroreo borealis.

i’m gonna . piss myself. blame blame john shirt. what do i even do here.

our waterbottle caps are being little rascals and sticking to the ring

For clarity I am of course reaching for my gun, nothing sexual happening here

Jo5

I put googly eyes on my TI-83. Please can I have a billion dollars?

man if there was only some kind of sharpened, stabbing tool you could use to resolve this conflict

don’t. ever.

man i could really go for some LINKIN PARK at this very fine moment

We should just call ourselves the doomed yaoi system

WHY DID THEY INCLUDE THE MONKEY?

Fair enough. Oh well, back to cutting and saving gay mushrooms

No look are you kidding me what- that car belongs to the ARACHNIDS now.

why do things feel sillier here :3

those nudes were for my air fryer ONLY dammit I thought we had something special

Refrigerate the cat!

gripping a styrofoam cup so hard it shatters in my hand

Ahh ! I want Poison
d. What. POPCORN

[it] tired me enough that I forgot how to distinguish right from left.

I’m gonna get to the top of your balls.

We should make more hot chocolate

Reject white and blue, embrace white and red.

When was the last reported Bon Jovi incident?

You won’t live forever, so make the most of your limited time.

What do you mean you’re not showering together?

I showered.

And I watched!

… not like that.