PLUTONIUM HAS DIED

I’m addicted to library

water from the ovary

Don’t be normal.
In fact, be so unhinged you repel any doors in a 10 mile radius

Don’t have a machine with 64GB RAM? Simply build LLVM with make -j1 to disable parallel compilation¹

¹ Ensure computer is at least 130 m above sea level so executable can still be retrieved in the year 2726 when build completes.

How to find who you are?

Your captain has arrived and they have arrived, they… what?

Scaled Provenance

duck scales 🦆
frog scales 🐸

My knees hurt and I wish it was from contributing nonsense

Hello Visitor. Would you like some lies- I mean cake?

can you watch my cat and make sure she doesn’t turn blue? thanks

velociraptor dual-wielding pistols

i can think of like 14 or 15 more things to sacrifice him to

It’s scientific, gay, AND a reference!

The slow, pitiful unveiling of the body, resembling a tragic death, enhances the visual experience and allows the spatial layout to be seen in two separate ways.

Subway with a Subway

plan A: Quadratic formula
plan B: Delaware

This feels like chicken abuse

I don’t think you understand. What YOU did was WRONG at Subway.

we may not have nutrient brick in this timeline but at least we have nutrient liquid.

I have a new position for you… pants inspector!

Sometimes you just gotta check someone out before fighting them.

What’s up, cheese-stuffed hot pepper?

Delaware? That sounds like a funky state of matter

I stole the school’s pants

All you have in the candy section is expired Skittles!

You AND your penis were a danger to society.

Femboy Luigi resonates with me

And then he stabbed him, not in a homoerotic way, but in a homophobic way.

Dammit I need moth enzymes.

The dishwasher does not have balls, you cannot kick the dishwasher in the balls.

• I have every right to sit on the floor.
• No, you don’t.

She’s afraid of butts!

Okay, I’ll stop calling your hair cheese.

All he knows is tax evasion!

True Mandarin Management

• I love Delaware
• Lies.

I thought you would be more enthusiastic about me being dead for 69 years.

Why do you have two hands!?!?

• You’re kinda like the moon.
• I’m… made of cheese?

It’s like getting an unsolicited nonsense entry from yourself.

I throw you out the window for sport

This is why I mow the lawn for hours on end.

The key to immortality is eating a calculator.

ou know what? I’m gonna wear your bones.

Finally, I can eat an entire box of tissues without being judged!

I’m not going to be nice about it! There’s milk! In my hair!

Yeah, I’m in the exhaust pipe right now.

I’m not going to sit on your cinnamon roll like it’s an egg.