I’m spilling everyone’s metaphorical tea, then.

dude stop, we need to go shower not stare at the pretty flame twinkle and twankle all over the place

forget the freezer, why are there stripper boots?

i will guess-what-chicken-butt kick your head if you do that one more fucking time

dungeons and don’t fucking do that

Nooo you just lost 98 cents D:

quit spawning the tortilla enemies

queso isn’t meant to look like a marshmallow that got thrown into the sun!!!

hey wait why are there stripper boots in the freezer

Do you not know what fucking mold is?

we love you but your way of living is concerning to the average human being

I’m gonna slap the shit out of you if you keep talking about my steak like that.

vehicular manslaughter is not something to giggle about

I DON’T WANT MEAT IN MY EYES! I’D RATHER MY MEAT STAY OUT OF MY EYES, OKAY?

Percussive maintenance. Tried and true.

do u need a thappor

you do not understand how down i am for a race to see how many times one can die in a round

REDACTED influencer silenced by drone-launched deer piss glitter bombs.

IT’S MATHEMATICS, NOT MATHEMATIC!!!

Mathematics is the art of
.

There’s not much difference between maths and enlightenment.

Does that look like an EVEN COAT to you?!

this just in! local 14 year old does college calculus homework!!!

i don’t know, there’s a balance between simplicity and complexity that we have to walk the line of every single time we draw him, and it’s like getting penis dimensioned

nothing like being blasted in the face with a wall of hot chicken air

The nudism sandwich is back.
Hello there, nudism sandwich!

im about to make you into frog stew is what im going to do.

you are a coward and the flies will know your name.

y’know what? Fuck it. If I drink some soap juice, so be it.

Drive a car, get nipples

They’re online. Oh no…

NO, I HAVE A TRUMPET, AM I SUPPOSED TO BE QUIET WITH A TRUMPET? I DONT THINK SO.

Pluto being or not being a planet has nothing to do with Hades being a god

i’m not going to throw you a party. and if you want brownies, you can just make them.

BEING A PIRATE DOESN’T EXEMPT YOU FROM BISEXUALITY!!!!

Any muffin turns into a blueberry muffin if you leave it in the pantry long enough!

You said ‘gargle my ballsack’.

chew on copper cables with me!!!

120 milligrams of grunky scripples for breakfast

🏘️🏘️🏘️🏘️🏠🏠🏠🏠🏡🏠🏡🛏️🛏️🛏️🛌💤💤💤

Taxes aren’t real, you silly

Yeah yeah we all know about the panopticon you’re not special.

you want to make out with a cowboy in a gas mask whose face has never been shown, shut UP

if you can’t beat it, eat it

• Honestly, you talk about Cambridge University like it kissed you tenderly at your best friend’s birthday party and called you the most beautiful woman alive twenty years ago, and now you’re doomed to think about it fondly on the morning of your wedding to another.
• What.

Current location of Visitor: lost in ao3

It’s.. My.. Nonsense

Take risks. Put hot Cheetos on everything

Please tell me they have sweet peas, I can’t imagine a world without sweet peas, I love sweet peas.

Why you got yo tighty whities out?