Now, if you’re Italian, you might want to click away at this point.

(Questo omosessuale on sa un c*zzo.)

If you decide to stay… well, scusatemi tantissimo for the pasta crimes I’m about to commit.

I don’t think Giancarlo over there is gonna bust my kneecaps with a baseball bat, but what can I say, I’m Valencian, I’m a paella purist — I respect a pasta purist. Game recognizes game.